Which one today?

I hate it when I say something and all you can hear is the fun outside.

Hurt works in a circle. I get hurt, I hurt you, and hurt myself again.

Lost count of the number of times my selfishness has led to the start of this vicious cycle. I feel like a gambling addict, saying time and again that I’d change, but never doing so. My lack of far sightednes has resulted in me acting in ways which I regret afterward.

I know and am ashamed of my flaws, yet, like a leopard can never change its spots, it’s difficult to change, much as I’d want to. My greatest hate is how I show it so easily now when I’d try my best to compress it in the past.

Guess being born this way is why nobody ever really stays.

”我不忍你，谁忍你？“

True to the words above, never have I met someone who’s been able to accept my flaws, my past and my present for such a long time. Never has someone cared for me unconditionally, without the slighted tinge of judgement.

No one’s ever given in to my whines, tolerated my bouts of tantrums (at 3am) or dropped by my workplace just to satisfy my craving for a can of Coke.

Till I met you. 

No one can expect a relationship to be forever smooth sailing. Actually, a smooth sailing relationship, to me, is in fact one that comes with arguments and whatnots. Much as I really want to kill you sometimes, you’re the last person I’d ever want to see walk out of my life.

Happy Valentine’s/14th.

Beginning to think that Tumblr isn’t exactly an appropriate platform for me to share my thoughts, looking at how others use it. Time to change. But lazy’s the word.

Whenever I’m in the shower, multiple thoughts rush to my head. So much so, I easily forget which came to my mind first. And then, the moment I step out of the toilet and pick up my pen to write these thoughts in my diary, my mind becomes a blank, totally unable to recall what I was thinking just 5 minutes ago. Imagine my agony.

I think I should one day become a nun and pray for people. Today, I came across the blog of someone I know, and my heart ached so badly for her when I read a certain post. As if I haven’t been feeling heavy enough.

My emotional ups and downs are so easily altered by love. Sick.